The Stone the Builder Refused: Rejection and Redemption
By: Diana Renee Williams
Rejection is not a pleasant experience for anyone. Whether it comes as a social snub, unrequited love, or getting passed over for a job, rejection hurts. Rejection deals a direct blow to the ego.
The psychological aftermath of rejection causes emotional wounds which if left unhealed can fester in to shame, anxiety, or embarrassment. Rejection also has serious implications for society as very often those ostracized become angry, violent, and aggressive. Think Ferguson, Missouri and now the current state of affairs.
The pain of rejection is real. New research in psychology and neuroscience has suggested that the same brain pathways that are activated when we experience physical pain are also activated when we experience emotional pain.
According to these studies, as far as our brain is concerned, a broken heart is not so different from a broken arm.
So, how do we heal the brokenness of the rejected soul? Quite possibly by looking at those who were healed despite experiencing rejection.
Throughout history, many innovative leaders have been rejected. The steadfast and daring views of Former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt…rejected. The profound philosophies of Aristotle…rejected. The harmonic compositions of Johann Sebastian Bach…rejected.
The peaceful efforts of Nelson Mandela…rejected. The message of love sang by John Lennon…rejected. The Truth spoken by Bob Marley…rejected. And of course, who could forget Jesus of Nazareth’s lament, “A prophet has no honor in his own hometown.”
Not quite the faces that readily come to mind when you think of a “reject.”
Surprisingly, not only did each one of these courageous people experience the social trauma of rejection, but they also experienced the private trauma of rejection from their own parents.
As children, each had a unique story that ultimately celebrated the antidote of self acceptance. Toxic messages of rejection began as early as childhood as each would be abandoned, orphaned or adopted as children.
It is almost as if the Great Architect of the Universe laid down a blueprint for the ultimate crash course in rejection for these unsuspecting souls. Ouch! What a seemingly sadistic plot, or was it perhaps the greatest act of mercy and the greatest love story ever written?
When faced with the trauma of rejection, these heroes demonstrated the amazing fact that the human mind and spirit have a divine capacity for recovery and growth.
Each took on the mindset that life did not happen to them but for them and made the decision to tap in to internal resources and connect with the gift of rejection. Each channeled their own innate genius and creativity and stood in the glory of their true potential despite the circumstances.
Each kept the purity of heart to connect with others and share their voice and message despite being given the cold shoulder and trusted and deemed themselves worthy.
While embracing vulnerability, each shared their gifts and talents with the world and ultimately found redemption. With their own hands, their wounds were healed.
Each removed the label of reject that was placed upon them and replaced it with the truth that was inscribed on their hearts.
To reject themselves would have been blashephmous as the light of divinity lays within each of us waiting to take form.
Rejection can in fact sting, but sometimes a no is a cleverly disguised yes. Rejection does not mean that you are not good enough, it means that person failed to see what you have to offer and you have to keep building. You are the cornerstone and have unique talents and gifts that are waiting to be released. Sometimes a no is quite simply a not yet so that you can keep building.
So, next time you get that dreadful rejection letter or get blown off by that new love interest just remember to keep building because you are a builder and creating a complete masterpiece.
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